i’m not afraid of dying

i’m afraid of knowing that i have not lived my life with purpose
i’m afraid of knowing that i have not lived while i was given the chance to
i’m afraid of not achieving all the goals that i have set for myself

i’m afraid of not getting to tie the loose ends
i’m afraid of not taking ahold of the chance i had to forgive everyone who caused me pain
i’m afraid of not being forgiven by the ones i’ve inflicted pain to

i’m afraid of just being nothing but a memory to the ones i’ve left
i’m afraid of knowing the truth that the memories we shared were their least favorite

i’m afraid of not getting to express how much i love the people that marked a place in my heart
i’m afraid of knowing that their feelings were never true and i was never in their heart to start with

i’m afraid of the words that i didn’t say because i refused to
i’m afraid of all the opportunities that i turned down because i was a coward

i’m afraid of all the souls i didn’t get to touch
faces i didn’t get to meet
memories i didn’t get to capture
lullabies i didn’t get to sing
hearts i didn’t get to see
wounds that didn’t get to heal
and emotions that i didn’t get to feel

i’m afraid of failing everyone around me
but most importantly,
i’m afraid of failing myself
even though i am and i have always marked myself as a failure.

Advertisements

type down your thoughts regarding this post! :)

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s